Random Thoughts by Deionte

Random Thoughts (in the rain)

Rain = Nap Time
I don’t know is about the rain that makes me want to go to sleep! Whenever it rains I become extremely lazy and all I can think about is sleeping or spooning in the rain. I woke up late as usual today and I was running around trying to get out of the house at a decent hour (which totally didn’t happen). Anywho, I make it to the Bart Station and I was less then happy because I had to run to make my Bart. So once I get on the Bart I became really sleepy and I did the unthinkable. That’s right I fell asleep on the Bart so 27 minutes later I wake up and I have no idea where the hell I am at!

So once I make it to the next Bart Station I find out that I am in fucking Fremont which is like 15 Bart Stations from where I should have gotten off at. So now I have to go across the Bart Station and go all the way back to 19th street in Oakland. So I make it to work super late and my supervisor bitch is less than happy with me. I had a really hot booty call the other night and after lots of freakiness I fell asleep and came to work late 3 hours late yesterday. Anywho, I was late for my meeting with supervisor bitch and I believe after lunch I will receive my first write-up from work! Damn you rain, damn you str8 to hell!

Fashionable Rain Attire
I know it is hard to dress when it rains because you don’t want to get your nice clothes wet. But this is not an excuse to come out of the house looking a fucking mess! I was sitting next to this bitch on Bart who has on a pink beret, yellow raincoat, red plaid shirt, black dress pants (with paints stains), bright yellow rain-boots, and the wonderful fragrance of wet dog! Not to mention she was a loud breather and if there is one thing I hate is loud breathers…be quiet!!!!

Vagina Monologues
So I was watching the Vagina Monologues on HBO last night and it was very entertaining. Personally believe that anyone with a vagina should see the show because it real and moving to say the least. This woman Eve Ensler traveled all of the world and interviewed woman on issues pertaining to the vagina. Now everyone knows that I am not a big fan of the vagina and lets face it their not the most appealing thing to look at. Well actually I’ve never seen a real vagina, thank God the only ones I have seen were on porn but you get the picture. Anywho, who knew that vaginas were so interesting and funny! My favorite monologues were titled "My vagina is angry" about the many hardships vaginas have to endure such as papsmears, tampons, and menstruation. "When my vagina died" which is about a young girl who was raped multiple times by family members. But the most moving monologue in my opinion was entitled "I was there…" about the miracle of birth. After watching the Vagina Monologues I have come to the conclusion that I have been too hard on millions of vaginas in the world and for that I must say Oooohhh well keep your nasty, coody ridden vaginas away for me! Ewwwwwwwwww!

Flash Dance in the rain
Am I the only person who has ever wanted to flash dance in the rain wearing full on 80’s attire??? And by 80’s attire I mean multi-color spandex, leg warmers, head bands, and lots of glitter!

Loud Pee’rs
I am I the only person who is really disturbed by loud pee’rs? I mean they come into the bathroom and then its like standing next to Niagra fucking Falls. I used to think that if I guy was a loud pee’r then that meant that he had a large penis, remind I came to this conclusion while I was I little boy but never-the-less…what the fuck am I talking about!

America’s Next Top Model
Okay so its getting down to the wire with ANTM and I am super excited. I have a pool going on at work to see who will win ANTM and I am in the lead! That’s right at the beginning of the season I decided to go with black power dominance for this show and picked that the three black tramps would win. Well 2 of those tramps are actually in the finally 3…score! Anywho, I like to watch ANTM and have a casual drink and by casual I mean drink myself sorrows away and get shitty drunk with my roommate! Ooooohhh has anyone seen Tyra’s talk show?? Thought not. Her show sucks the big one and my favorite moments was when we was talking all "ghetto" to Mary J. Blige and she started laughing at her. Tyra is as ghetto as all the white chicks I have listed on myspace combined. Not to dis anyone but Tyra needs to get her shit together!

Put some fucking clothes on!
I’m gonna start a petition and I would like everyone to sign it. This petition is intended to be a wake-up call for Ms. Mariah Carey. I swear to god I honestly cannot handle looking at her boobs or cudder anymore. She’s like 35 fucking years old, why does she feel the need to dress like a fucking tramp 24-7???? We all know that her ex-husband and record label force her to dress conservative but I think she has taking her emancipation a little too gotdam far! Did anyone see Mariah at the American Music Awards??? She was a fucking mess as usual her tits, ass, vagina were on display for all to see…whore!

Ooohhhh I see you went to Chico State
So today I was running late so I threw on some jeans, boots and a Chico State Alumni sweater. We all know that Chico State has a reputation for being a party school and hell any of us who attended Chico State knows that is a true statement. Can anyone explain to me why people feel the need to talk shit about our Alma Mater to our faces? I swear if one more person implies that I did not learn anything while at Chico besides how to do a decent keg stand I’ll kill them. Side Note: Who does kegs after sophomore year…okay maybe junior year. Now will you please excuse me while I go down to the basement to take a couple of shots of Vodka and Red bull to get me through my work day…j/k!

Uggs
I don’t know if I spelled that right but I am referring to the boots that all the girls were wearing a few years ago. Can somebody explain to me why girls continue to wear these boots and why they wear them with a skirt? Maybe I am confused but I thought the main purpose of a skirt was to keep you cool in warm/hot weather. I also thought the reason one would wear uggs is to keep you warm during cold weather. The 2 don’t mix get it together ladies and gentleladies! Lol!

posted by Lady_Sings_tha_blues @ 2:14 PM